Poop on the couch

I work with some brilliant colleagues. But we all have our moments right? And hindsight is certainly 20/20.

So there was this patient Mr Stool. He had a bit of the delirium. He tried to escape from his bed a lot. So sometimes he got a roll belt around his waist and his bed alarm was always on. (PS letting your patient fall is a big no-no. It makes managers yell at you and CNOs have small strokes. Oh and sometimes the patient breaks a hip... So we do many mean things to you while you're confused to keep you from falling.)

Well one morning, one of our esteemed nurses decided that in an attempt to placate Mr Stool and keep him from escaping, he'd offer him his choice of seats (this chair with the black seatbelt or that chair with the blue one...) Instead, Mr Stool wanted to sit on the little couch that's for visitors and families. 

"Hmmm..." thinks Nurse Vinny. "Well ok."

The couch is strategically missing the seatbelt that the chairs have, as our visitors rarely need seatbelts. So Mr Stool proceeded shit his brains out and I mean like the biggest amount of poop you can imagine being inside a human multiplied by 11. Since he was on the couch and therefore, sans seatbelt, Mr Stool basically created his own poopy slip 'n slide and wiggled himself right on to ground. Covered in poop.

Can't you just imagine walking in the room to give Mr Stool his am meds and instead find him on the floor covered in and surrounded by poop? Sucks to be that nurse.